21 Things To Avoid For A Long-Lasting Relationship

By Marcella Raskin

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happy relationship

It’s not always easy to maintain a long-lasting relationship.

There are so many things that can go wrong and ruin the happiness you once felt with your partner.

But, there are also many things you can do to avoid these problems altogether!

This article will discuss twenty-one of them in detail, giving you advice on how to prevent specific issues from ever arising in the first place.

Check it out below for some great tips on maintaining a happy life with your loved one!

Avoid making yourself too available to them.

People think that the best way to show someone you love them is by being there whenever they need you, but this can have the opposite effect. 

When you’re always around and never give your partner room to breathe or miss you, they’ll start feeling suffocated and looking elsewhere for space.

Give each other breathing room from time to time so that neither person feels smothered in their relationship.

Don’t let your life revolve around theirs! Make sure to maintain a healthy amount of space between each other for both of you to grow as individuals while remaining connected.

Don’t mistake sex for intimacy.

Sex is a great way to feel connected with your partner, but it shouldn’t become the only thing you use to express affection.

If that’s all there is in the relationship, then you’ll start feeling unfulfilled and eventually get bored of each other or, worse, lose interest entirely!

Make sure you’re always expressing love through more than just physical contact, which will help keep up some excitement between both of you, so neither person feels neglected.

Having sex isn’t what makes a life-lasting relationship; mutual understanding and care for one another are more critical factors!

Don’t be a control freak.

You may think you’re the only one who knows what’s right for your relationship, but this behavior will likely break trust.

Remember that both of you have desires and opinions on how things should sustain the bond between yourselves.

Don’t be a control freak. You need to let your partner live their life and share the responsibility of taking care of it together. If you don’t, both lives will get too dull, and you’ll both become unhappy.

This is a biggie and probably the biggest mistake you can make in your relationship.

Don’t try to control who they hang out with or where they go because this will lead to resentment from them—and if it doesn’t, you have even more significant problems than just being controlling!

Allow them the space to learn from their own mistakes without interfering in any major way.

If two individuals can show mutual respect while also holding their personal space, then there will likely be less strain on communication lines which could lead to arguments later down the line. This ultimately means a healthier future together, so don’t be a control freak!

Avoid being judgmental.

We all have a list of qualities we think our partner should have, but don’t be so quick to judge them if they seem different from what you expected.

They might not meet your expectations now, but this isn’t always going to be the case.

It’s their life, and therefore it is entirely up to them how they choose to live it! They need time for themselves and for you, too- nobody can rush that process by constantly being critical or trying to change who they are.

Give each other space instead and talk things through when necessary without any negative judgments involved—it will lead to much better results than if both parties were constantly on edge with one another due to criticism.

Remember that nobody is perfect, and neither are you! If your partner has a bad habit or two, then they’re going to need lots of understanding from you for them to break the cycle.

Criticizing won’t help, so take it easy, leave room for improvement but don’t be judgmental either—it can lead both parties down a slippery slope, which will ultimately end up ruining your relationship with one another.

Don’t think that you know everything.

If either of you comes across as someone who thinks they have all the answers, then your relationship will not work out very well for both parties!

This is a big problem in relationships, and it makes each person feel unappreciated because nobody likes feeling like they don’t matter or aren’t good enough in their partner’s eyes.

Nobody knows everything, so be humble and accept this fact—it will take some pressure off when one party inevitably does not get something entirely right the first time around.

Remember: we are only human after all! This means errors every now and again, which may need ironing out together- but try not to let them hold you back from being a success.

You have to keep the communication lines between you always open because nobody has all the answers, no matter how much they may think they do!

Avoid taking your partner for granted.

things to avoid

Don’t take each other’s presence lightly, and always make sure you show them that they matter to you every day, so it doesn’t become a habit of being forgetful!

In relationships, there will be times when things get busy, or one person seems too preoccupied with work, but this isn’t an excuse to neglect the other party involved. Remember what made you fall in love with them in the first place and try to find time for just the two of you routinely if possible.

You can never have enough quality time together because even though life is busy, it should still revolve around making memories that are important to both parties and spending some special moments alone. This helps to strengthen your relationship and shows that you care.

Avoid being inflexible.

It is impossible to always agree with your partner on everything, but you should both try to be as flexible and open-minded as possible.

For instance, if they want something that might seem strange at first, you could suggest trying it out before passing judgment. If it turns out poorly, then so be it! But what’s the harm in a bit of experimentation?

Part of being inflexible would include refusing to listen when your partner tries talking about their feelings towards certain topics.

Make sure that there are no taboos between the two of you, and remember: It’s better for both parties to feel comfortable expressing themselves rather than bottling up emotions until they explode.

Avoid talking down to your partner.

You should never belittle or humiliate a person you care about, whether it’s in public or private. If someone were so unkind and disrespectful towards you, would you want them to remain in your life?

We all may do this occasionally by accident (for example: saying something like “it must be nice not having a job!” when our spouse is unemployed). Still, it becomes toxic if the behavior continues.

Try practicing active listening or mirroring back what you think your partner may have said before responding. This way, they know for sure that their opinions and feelings are valid and valued rather than dismissed.

Do not be afraid of change – embrace it!

It would be incredibly boring if two partners fell into a routine after sharing years together because neither wanted to rock the boat by suggesting new experiences for fear of the unknown.

While the change will happen naturally as you age, it’s essential to try and keep things new and exciting!

When was the last time that the two of you embarked on a spontaneous adventure together? Perhaps this is simply not possible with small children (although they can come along!).

However, even taking them for ice cream or picking up fast food after work would be an exciting way to bring novelty into your lives. Think how much fun it might be instead of thinking about what needs to get done immediately afterward.

Avoid the temptation to try and change your partner.

You cannot force someone else to be who you want them to be, no matter how much effort or time you put into it.

Whether this means telling yourself that they’ll “come around eventually” or doing something about it, you will only end up disappointed in the long run.

Instead of trying to change your partner into someone they’re not meant to be (and vice versa), focus on what makes them unique and appreciate their special qualities instead of picking apart every aspect that bothers you about them!

As hard as it might seem at first, learning to accept each other for who they are is the most crucial step towards a successful relationship.

The only person who can turn things around are themselves, so let go of any hope for this outcome if there were any in the first place.

Most importantly: If your significant other isn’t interested in trying new experiences or growing as an individual despite multiple attempts on your end, then what’s even the point?

Avoid breaking promises.

No one likes being let down, so avoid making any commitments you don’t intend to keep or backing out of plans at the last minute because something more important came up. Doing this will only cause unnecessary heartache and confusion for your partner as well as yourself!

If you are unsure of whether or not you will be able to attend an event, then it’s best that you give your partner a heads up as soon as possible rather than waiting until the day to cancel.

It’s okay to be human and make mistakes, but try not to let them happen too often for your own good!

Do not compare your relationship with others.

You might feel tempted from time to time to take note of how much easier things seem to work out in some relationships compared to yours (and vice versa), but do not let this become a habit!

Comparing your relationship with others is wrong because everyone’s situation is different. It’s easy to forget that you and your partner are on an individual journey together as a couple, not as part of a competition with other couples.

Remember: A successful relationship requires two individuals who are equally committed to making things work between them. No one else matters besides the two of you – so stop focusing on how other couples handle situations and focus more on what makes you a great team together instead of worrying about everything outside yourselves!

Avoid making excuses for bad behavior or emotional outbursts.

relationship with your significant other

If you have a history of misbehaving, it’s time to take responsibility for your actions!

Whether this means apologizing or making amends in another way depends on what caused the issue(s) in the first place and how they can be prevented from happening again – but do not avoid them just because you think that doing so will make things easier.

Getting rid of the bad behavior that you used to resort to coping with your emotions is more challenging than it might seem.

Holding onto these coping mechanisms can only make things worse for both of you since they are unhealthy and not sustainable!

Do not be afraid to ask for help if needed.

If there’s a problem between you two or one person thinks something isn’t quite right but does not know how to bring it up, then this should end up being discussed.

Whether this means seeking out counseling together or talking with an impartial third party, do not let your pride get in the way of communicating clearly about what you both want and need from each other.

Do not ignore red flags.

If something feels off about your significant other, then it probably is.

Ignoring red flags will only make things worse down the line, so try and address whatever issues you may be having with each other as soon as possible instead of pretending like nothing’s wrong or brushing them off.

Do not stop trying after the first attempt fails.

If you try something new and it doesn’t work out, that only means that you are taking one step closer to finding what does!

Stop thinking about your failures as a reason for giving up or becoming discouraged because they will eventually lead to further success in due time if you hang on long enough.

Do not use jealousy to control your partner’s behavior.

Jealousy isn’t a good look on anyone! Using this feeling to get what you want out of your significant other won’t help build trust between the two of you but rather break it apart even more than before if they feel that your actions are threatening their individuality.  

Do not ignore your partner’s preferences.

If they’re unwilling to do something that you want them to, don’t push the issue any further if it makes them uncomfortable!

It might be hard for some people (especially those who are used to being in control), but try and show a little empathy towards their position instead of brushing off their feelings as unimportant so that you can get what you want out of the situation.

Do not keep score.

Not everything is a competition, even if you feel like it should be!

Remember to appreciate your partner for who they are as an individual. Stop thinking about what you could potentially lose from this relationship since there’s nothing that can’t be gained instead, as long as you both remember to remain loyal and supportive of one another no matter what.

Do not neglect your friends and family members.

Remember that you have a life outside of this relationship!

Having different types of relationships is healthy, so don’t let your social circle shrink just because someone else came into the picture. They’ll only resent being left out in favor of others if it goes on too long without explaining why this change occurred.

Don’t give up on each other no matter how bad things seem at times!

Relationships take work – just like everything else worthwhile usually does – and there will be days when one or both parties feel discouraged about whatever issues currently exist between the two of you, which may lead to them wanting to give up.

Make it clear that you are willing to work things out if they want, but only do so under the condition that both of you will try your best not to let little fights get in the way of what’s important between the two of you!

Believe me when I say that fighting through tough times together builds a stronger bond than either party could have imagined before – which makes everything worth all of the effort! Commitment isn’t easy and takes hard work, yet its rewards are more than worth it in the end.

Conclusion

In this blog post, we shared 21 things you should avoid for a long-lasting relationship.

I hope that these tips are helpful when it comes to maintaining the health of your relationship!

As long as you both don’t give up on each other, everything else will fall into place in due time.

Remember to communicate clearly about what is bothering or upsetting either of you to find solutions together. Try not to let past mistakes get in the way for too much longer because it’ll only make things harder down the line since they’re still affecting how you interact today.

Don’t forget that good communication skills go a very long way towards helping maintain any healthy relationship between two people – no matter if this bond consists of friends, family members, roommates, etc… If anything, take a step back and think about how you would want others to treat the people that mean the most to you.

In conclusion, if both partners are willing to put in the effort, then there is no reason they shouldn’t be able to enjoy each other’s company for however long they’d like!

Did any of these things resonate with you? Do you have anything to add that we missed?

Comment below and let us know what other pieces of advice or warnings would be helpful!

Author

  • Marcella Raskin is the founder & editor-in-chief. She is a passionate and articulate writer who has dedicated her life to studying human potential. She has studied Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Life Purpose Coaching, Group Life Coaching. She loves helping women (and men) explore themselves through writing, which allows for an exploration into one's thoughts on entrepreneurship or personal development topics such as mindset-shaping techniques that can positively shape someone's perspectives about themselves when they don't think it could ever happen! She practices sports and has studied Exercise Physiology. She is married and the mother of two girls.

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